Finding THE One

Yup, it’s been two whole months since my last post.

No, it wasn’t Sahara season but I must admit that I spent all of February being in a KURT limbo.

Limbo-2

Some weeks after I returned from Phuket, Kurt texted and we resumed our ‘friendship’.. and by friendship, I meant texting daily and not actually hang out other than to meet after party hours like we used to. No F-ing either.

Though I was once again an emotional train wreck, I can proudly say I am way over him now after realizing what a judgmental douchebag he has been about the way I choose to live my life. Who is he to judge when he has two girlfriends here in KL and one in Germany. No one needs judmental F-Boys like this in their lives!

So yeah, I recruited a Tinder F-bud but could hardly go through with my V-Day F cause Kurt was occupying all of my brain space and I snapped out of it mid-F after I achieve my orgasm, dressed up to leave right after when we actually planned for me to stay the night. It was our second time and he is a good F as much as he’s pretty fun to hang with. What a waste, that English Tinder dude was hot!

When March rolled along, I started F-ing an old acquaintance, LEON regularly. Like once or twice a week, all month long till things naturally faded out. This one’s local, half European, a previous CLEO Bachelor and pretty damn popular with the ladies.

But still, I’m clueless about what to write about as none of these F-Buds and one nighters are blog worthy. There is of course this one dude that stood out but he’s so high profile that there is no way for me to write about him without being obvious as to who he is. KL is a small place after all!

Christy on the other hand managed to make a boyfriend out of a one nighter she plucked from the club. All happy and intoxicated with love, she tells me to get a boyfriend too.

Christy: How are you ever going to get a boyfriend if you get bored of F-ing a guy after 5 weeks?!
Me: Exactly. I ain’t looking for one.
Christy: Don’t you ever wanna settle? I’m so happy right now!
Me: I’m happy for you but I can’t imagine having a boyfriend, let alone husband if I can’t even sustain a F-Bud!

Relationships aren’t just about trust and love. It has got a lot to do with chemistry. Compatibility can’t be forced. It’s not just personality compatibility, but also sexual compatibility and chemistry.

 

CHEMISTRY

We all know about chemistry in general. How we get along with someone as soon as you meet them. How you read one another’s mind and finish each others’ sentences. How you’d laugh till your belly hurts at their jokes when your friends simply roll their eyes because it ain’t all that funny.

 

COMPATIBILITY

compatibility

Then there’s compatibility. If you spend your nights chugging shots after shots and your days curled up with a hangover, while your partner prefers to hike early in the AMs and spend the day at the waterfall, we are going to have a huge problem. You could love each other to bits, but your lifestyle ain’t gonna match!

 

COMPROMISE

I know, I know. Compromise. Yes, you can. But the after effect of compromising is just anger. Anger that you don’t get to party with your friends and miss out on life. Anger that you have been taken away from things you love, eg. animals, nature, art, etc..

 

SEXUAL CHEMISTRY

Most girls would say, “Nahhh, it doesn’t matter as long as I love him“. Bullshit. I have loved CHAD a whole lot. I even considered spending the rest of my life with him. But there was never sexual chemistry with us. Sex was just wham, bam, thank you ma’am! I felt nothing!

I don’t know about you but I go into a F-Frenzy when the chemistry is good. Like nothing else matters and all I want is to devour the dude. That raw, passionate lust.. and when it’s over, you just snap back into reality. Not even talking about emotions here.

 

SEXUAL COMPATIBILITY

The sexual chemistry I had with my last boyfriend, LUKE on the other hand was unmistakable. It was downright crazy. BUT.. we were no where near compatible. While his sex drive was close to non-existent, mine shoots above the roof. Trust me, arguing about sex is anything but sexy. There wouldn’t even be any make up sex involved.

Read: Sex 4 times in a year after the sexual tension cooled off. No wonder I cheated!

Then of course there is that issue about trying new things. My ex-boyfriend, CHAD would not even try watching porn with me. My friend got me a pair of cuffs that sat on the shelves for years. Need more description of my sad sex life?

 

 

PERSONALITY

This is a tricky one. I truly believe there is someone out there for everyone.

While Christie liked the down to earth, quieter ones, the Beta males, I loved the loud, obnoxious Alpha males that Christie cringes and rolls her eyes at.

The louder he is, the more he has my attention. Them Beta males just won’t cross my line of vision.

Two months back I had to take JOHN‘s little brother out on his first trip to KL and I didn’t feel like doing it alone so I got SETH to come with me. Seth planned it all out from the bars, to being a wingman, to keeping all of us in check. There is no way I’d settle for anything less than someone who can lead a pack.

I can very well lead the pack, but sometimes a girl just wants her man to do it for her.

Christie and I even joked about how I should schedule three Tinder dates at once and bring them out with a group of friends. That would be the easiest way to determine who’s the alpha in the group.

I certainly cannot imagine what would happen if I had all my (previous) alphas at the same table.

 

PHYSICAL ATTRACTION

This should have been mentioned first.

Picture this – You see a hot girl at the bar, and you see an unattractive one. Which would you approach if you had to?

It’s true that beauty is only skin deep but you wouldn’t even have dug deeper if you didn’t like what you saw!

Now I’m not talking about Men’s Health/Victoria Secret model hot vs the boy/girl next door. I’m talking about what attracts YOU.

 

 

That being said, sure there is no perfect human being. But I believe that there is a perfect other half for you, and only you somewhere out there. One who would give you butterflies in your tummy and gets your juices flowing but utterly disgusts others.

 

VERDICT: Maybe it isn’t that I can’t sustain a F-Bud but that I cannot be F-ed to do so because they’re just another guy, from another club on another week.